You Think Hot, We Think Not: Part 2

SocialSlut February 6, 2014 80

Now it’s time for the fellas. There are things ladies do that they think are hot, when guys really think not. Time to break it down.

Again, like PART 1 of this series, everything is situational. Discuss with your partner.

1. UNCOMFORTABLE HEELS

Guys don’t care how sexy those heels are. If we can’t walk in them and are going to bitch all night about our feet hurting, they’d rather we wore flats. Honestly. I know, I know. Women everywhere are like, “Half the time I buy sexy shoes I’m thinking of a guy in mind!” Well cut it out. Buy shoes YOU like and that YOU can walk in. Men do not find complaining attractive.

2. TEETH BLOW JOBS

This is tough because a lot of guys like a girl to lightly use her teeth, but the truth is it’s just too dangerous. A girl gets excited when she knows she’s pleasing a guy, so using teeth and expecting to have enough control to use them lightly is putting a lot of pressure on both parties to not jolt or move too quickly where this could end up a disaster.

3. HIGH BOUNCES

When a girl is on top, she’s more in control of how everything goes down. She can ride, grind and/or bounce on some cock. But the guys I talked to all had a very scared look on their face when I said bounce. Some girls pull up so high that the dick is almost outside of them, and then they quickly slam back down. This TERRIFIES a guy. He is not enjoying your high bounces, he’s staring at his dick in fear that it will bend as you make your way back down. Be gentle when you’re on top ladies! You can get that deep penetration from another position where the guy has more control and isn’t afraid of getting his dick broken.

4. THE WRONG KIND OF THREESOME

As a bisexual girl working in the porn world, I quickly understood this comment. For a guy who has zero interest in sharing a girl, the wrong kind of threesome is one with two dicks and one pussy. To a guy, having two girls at the same time seems like heaven on Earth! So suggesting to a guy to have a threesome, then revealing the third person to be another man… just made him die a little on the inside.

5. FAKE TITS

I know, this is a hard pill to swallow. Especially hearing this and having to post it on this blog. At BangBros, we love all titties. So to say fake tits aren’t hot? That’s hard to post. But our contributor believes a chick with fake tits “might as well be wearing a sign that says self-esteem issues across their chest.” Hmm. That’s harsh. Women like to look good. Some feel good with the set they’ve got naturally, and some want augmentation. Either way, confidence is the sexiest. So whether you’re rocking fake tits or all natural, do it with confidence. Guys like that.

6. GIVE AND TAKE

There is a common thought amongst women: Men can be lazy and selfish lovers. While this can be true of either sex, it’s not generally true for everyone. Some women like to pin a guy down and take control. From taking off clothes, to the pace of kissing, then making their way into some oral pleasure. NEWS FLASH: Guys like to do this too! There are too many people out there that play this as black and white, when there’s a whole lot of grey area. Women shouldn’t lie back and let the man do all the work, but neither should men. A good give and take is what men want, hell, what we all want. Get a nice volley going.

7. TONS OF MAKEUP

It might have taken a chick a few tries to perfect her cat-eye makeup, but guys really don’t find an overdone face attractive. They want a girl who looks good waking up next to. If a woman spends all this time on her face, they feel like she’s hiding something. A little makeup is a good thing, but if you’re going to look one way at night and completely different in the morning, rethink your makeup strategy. Guys have enough trust issues with women because of images like this:

 

8. DEATH GRIP

I honestly didn’t even know hand jobs were still around. I know we post a Tugjobs video most Mondays, but that’s porn… and porn is not real life (in case you forgot!). So to hear that there are women out there giving death grip hand jobs scares me and leaves me with two solid questions: 1. Are you 14? 2. Are you trying to love it or kill it? A dick grip should be no harder than how you would hold a banana. If the banana squishes, you just killed a penis. Go to the grocery store and practice.

9. DON’T SPIT

Yes, some girls think a guy finds it hot when his load is too much to handle, and she has to spit it out. WRONG. Guys hate this. Abella Anderson says it best, “Spitters are quitters.” We stand by our cubanita and the contributor on this one. It’s a total turn off for the guy. And I have to ask… am I the only girl that didn’t even know spitting was an option? Swallow that shit. They love it.

10. UNEXPECTED ANAL TOUCHING

Seems like guys agree with girls on this. Any sort of unexpected touching, poking, or plowing in this region is a big no on both sides. Some guys are open to this and would welcome a thumb in the ass while getting a blow job, but it’s not safe to assume this is the majority. Hit this topic BEFORE you hit the bedroom. That way you’ll know for sure and won’t get kneed in the face.

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